Very seriously thinking about quitting camming on (camsite 1) and finding myself full time “normal” job to pay the rent..Then I can cam part time on (camsite 2) in the evenings.
I love (camsite 2) and have a great time but I just can't rely on it for a steady income. One night I will make $$$ and the next I will make 0.
When it comes to (camsite1) …Ugh. I just can't.
I can make good money there but it just feels like I am destroying my soul. I just can't do it. The sexual stuff is fine, I just hate the attitudes of the guys.
I just have such idiots in my room with no personality, no matter how fun and engaging I try to be and I feel like it's getting worse.
My main issue with camming so much as a fulltime job, is that I feel it is training me to actually hate and despise men. I hate how they are always trying to get stuff for free. I hate how they think they are so clever all the time. I hate how they are so ENTITLED. I hate how they think their cock is the greatest thing since sliced bread. I hate how rude they can be.
I HATE HOW THEY CAN BE SO MIND NUMBINGLY BORING.
I hate how, on (camsite 1) I sat there yesterday, bored because no one was talking to me, so I recited the ‘Jabberwocky' out loud to my room. All someone had to say to me after was ‘Nice rack'.
What the fuck. Get a personality.
I don't know. I think it's time to get a job. I can enjoy (camsite 2) then, without stressing if I have bad days. And the more relaxed I am about money, the more people tip.
I DON'T WANT TO HATE MEN. I like humanity. I don't want to hate people based on their gender. That is sexism. But it is getting that way and it scares me. Things must change.